Gender perspectives on paternity fraud, by Francis Ewherido

A Lagos-based DNA testing centre, Smart DNA Nigeria, released its 2025 Annual DNA Testing Report last Sunday, revealing that DNA testing surged to 13.1 per cent in 2025. It showed that 25 per cent of paternity tests returned negative, that is, one in every four fathers are not the biological fathers as presumed. The outcome is a slight decrease from 27 per cent in 2024. 

DNA tests have unearthed many buried secrets (breeze blow, fowl yansh open). Therefore, this result was not really surprising to me. I wrote about paternity fraud in the past and would not have revisited this topic, but the news item came to our table and the opinions were divided along gender lines. The today actors/actresses are between 58 and 64 years. The group comprises people in their 50s and 60s. There might be a few ancestors because our Winch Doctor changes members’ dates of birth, so even members are now confused on their date of birth. 

Winch Doctor said she doesn’t care if I mention her name in this article: “You can mention names. I’m too old to fear scandals and such things.” Madam Fone, another member, responded with “inukwa (what is it)” and “just negodu (look at this)” GIFs. But I won’t mention their real names. These rugged oldies will be unfazed.They are like a kpons (an old prostitute). No size of the penis scares a kpons. Which size has she not seen before? The discussion kicked off with, the most troublesome member, Oga. 

(Oga): “I want to hear from our smart women about this (the DNA results) o! Men, we foolish sha!”

Young grandfather: “Ah! Most (women) would pretend not to (know about) it. No be today nau.” 

Winch Doctor: “In traditional Igbo society, any child born by a woman whose bride price you paid is your child; If your legitimate wife runs to Kafanchan and returns with children, they are yours… Thank God that this law was made by men; otherwise women would be accused of making rules that favour them.” Her male apprentice wizard, Prof Eteh, concurred.

Prof Eteh: “It is the same culture in Akwa Ibom (State).”

Oga: “Well done, ma. Men, we are truly the foolish ones. I want to hear women talking about infidelity and blaming men as usual. Women are the masters of the game.”

Madam Fone: “See, what is bad is certainly not good. But I wonder why men feel hurt when served a dose of their own medicine. Truth be told, if men too could carry a pregnancy it would have been a 1-1 goalless draw. Do me, I do you. As it is, their own secret usually comes out when they are being dropped six feet below. Suddenly someone (or some people sef) show(s) up with his carbon copy(ies) and accompanying birth certificate, wanting to claim rights in the family. Imagine o! And the woman will be expected to have a “large heart” and accommodate them.

“Be that as it may, there are other reasons why paternity may be questionable. Some IVF procedures use borrowed sperms. It now depends on whether the man was aware or not. Then there’s this latest Crypto pregnancy which is completely 419. Many parents don’t know that neither of them are the biological owners of those children. It’s a complicated arrangement meant to help those with fertility issues. Unfortunately, many have been deceived into believing they conceived and delivered whereas na BIG LIE!!!!!

“But for those ladies who intentionally or even mistakenly caused a man to (be) father another man’s child, what can I say? Dem no try, but father na father nah. They should move on which ever way they can, the way we (women) take up their own load too with our ‘large heart.’  Shikena!”

Oga: “Women! Madam Fone, et tu!!! Excuses raised to power infinity.”

Bendel Babe: “Fertility treatment involves both the man and the woman. No sane or qualified doctor will treat only one of the couple. So, it’s not possible for a married woman to receive sperm donation without her husband’s consent…But this is happening, particularly in Nigeria, where fertility clinics are unregulated, plus, child swapping and stealing in the maternity wards. There are many reasons why this happens (paternity issues). Again, not making excuses for deliberate wickedness and deception.”

Winch Doctor: “IVF clinics often use viable sperms without informing the couple. They compete in the area of announcing successes that many breach protocols. I read the case of a clinic owner who used his sperm extensively before people knew what was going on. You men should stop this noise and tear-shedding, I don’t see what the fuss is about. Bring up every child in your house while your neighbour does the same. Let’s hear jare!!!!”

Triple Chief: “What is bad is bad. Whether the man is the one having babies outside or the woman defrauding the man by passing on a child that’s not his, it’s all bad.”

Here, I interjected.

Triple Chief responded to the Winch Doctor’s earlier post: “Only you can say this. If you allow this, we all go into a pit.”

Winch Doctor: “It’s because I am the only confirmed winch doctor (here). The noise is much. Men should allow us hear. Women have endured their excesses since the world was created without too much noise, let them reciprocate. Do men ever bother to ask themselves why the women they married are reluctant to give birth to children through them? Are we aware that many of these women deliberately choose not to be impregnated by the men they married? They have their reasons. Due to my perceived somewhat eccentric nature, I get told a lot of secrets. Men! Men! Men! Go organize a conference to sort yourselves out.”

Triple Chief: “Lol….Odi egwu o (amazing)!

Oga: “The only conference men need to organize now is men liberation movement. Our mumu don do. Imagine Winch Doctor temerity and Fone amalgam of excuses”

Bendel babe: “Why are you waiting for us to validate your belief? You know what you believe already; hold in to it (or) go to court… Men always feign to be the aggrieved party in this matter (paternity fraud), but are okay with having side chicks and multiple wives and partners. While not making excuses for deceptive women, you guys are crying like a hen that a hawk just took it’s chick. Is it not another man that fathered the said child? His wife may also do to him what he has done to another man. Equation balance! Next topic, please!”

Bendel Babe: reacting to my comment on deceit:”No one enjoys being deceived. It’s, however, the reality of life. After all, we take care of the maids/helpers that we hire. It hurts; but let’s move on. Otherwise, one is courting premature death. If the man can’t bear the deception, then he should remove the child from his inheritance.”

NB: I am unable to add my contribution and share my thoughts on all the issues raised due so space constraints, but I will in a later article. But, jokes apart, this gives you an idea of what some men and women think about paternity fraud. Food for thought?

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