Nigeria, where every meeting starts with prayer, erupts in war, and ends with Amen, by Stephanie Shaakaa

They say God is everywhere, but in Nigeria, He’s mostly attending meetings.

We summon Him at the start of every gathering with bowed heads and trembling voices, promising peace, order, and wisdom. Then, within minutes, we descend into chaos that could make even heaven request a transfer.

Only in Nigeria do meetings begin like church, sound like parliament, and end like a wrestling match, yet someone will still rise, sweaty and smiling, to say, Let’s thank God for a successful meeting. Successful? Only blood pressure was achieved.

Only here will people invite God into a meeting and then proceed to do everything He forbids.

We start with a solemn Let us pray,calling on divine guidance with bowed heads and trembling voices. Five minutes later, it’s like the gates of heaven closed and the gates of hell flung open. Lies start flying, tempers rise, chairs shift. By the time the shouting is done, someone will still grab the microphone and say, Let’s thank God for a successful meeting.

From boardrooms to classrooms, church committees to political caucuses, we are a nation that spiritualizes dysfunction. We invite divinity, then debate like devils.

In corporate Nigeria, the prayer before meetings is a survival tool. You’ll need divine strength to endure PowerPoint slides that have more words than the Bible and colleagues who say, Just to buttress what he said, only to start a new argument entirely. By the time the meeting ends, half the people are fasting unintentionally.

At the village square, it’s the same story. Elders begin with a libation or a prayer to the ancestors. Then someone coughs and says, Let’s speak the truth today, which is always the first sign that lies are about to follow. Before long, someone’s goats, land, or lineage will enter the discussion and the ancestors, somewhere, will be shaking their heads.

Even in church committees, the devil gets attendance. You’ll hear, Let’s commit this meeting into God’s hands, but by the time they start arguing over who should lead the choir or handle the offering, you’ll realize even angels might have left the room early.

Step into a Nigerian committee meeting and you’ll see why our democracy is both divine and dramatic. The first ten minutes belong to God, the next two hours belong to ego. We pray for wisdom, then interrupt the person giving it. We ask for peace, then start a war over who will chair the next subcommittee.

Even the National Assembly isn’t left out. They pray before plenary, yet by noon, microphones are off, tempers are on, and words like point of order start to sound like round one, fight.Still, at the end, everyone files out with a smile and a handshake.To God be the glory.

We don’t lack prayer,we lack post-prayer behavior. We ask God for wisdom, then interrupt anyone who tries to give it. We beg for peace, then draft new reasons to quarrel. We open with God but close with gossip, and still believe the prayer covered everything in between.

Maybe the problem isn’t that we pray before meetings. Maybe it’s that we never let the prayer continue through the meeting. If only we prayed during the meeting, somewhere between the shouting and the scheming, perhaps heaven would finally have a chance to respond.

From boardrooms to the National Assembly, from local councils to family meetings, we keep sanctifying our dysfunction with a prayer. Imagine if the sincerity of our opening prayers ever spilled into our decisions. This country would need fewer emergency sessions and more honest conversations.

Perhaps God keeps showing up to our meetings not because of our prayers, but because He knows what would happen if He didn’t.

In this country, meetings are not gatherings, they are ministries of noise. And yet, by some miracle, after every argument, lie, and ego display, we still manage to end with We thank God.

That’s Nigeria for you, a nation where chaos has a closing prayer, disorder wears a suit, and even the Almighty is on the attendance list.

Because in the end, only God could sit through a Nigerian meeting and still say, It is well.

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